Is the Pursuit of Happiness Elusive?

Human beings have always hung on to the illusion that happiness is brought about by something outside ourselves, that is, independent of ourselves. Even the very essence or nature or shall we call etymology of the word “happiness” I suspect comes from the word “hap from happening – ”. or “hap from perhaps “. Is happiness something that by chance happened to us or can we be happy irrespective of circumstances? Are we dependent on something, or a person or a special event to happen for us to be happy? Many people live their entire lives looking for the right job, the right mate, the right possessions, and the perfect background. Many people pursue happiness but few people find it. Happiness to many people becomes an event that happened accidentally.

Tragically our own experiences show us that happiness does not come the way we want. As soon as we obtain the thing we want the most, we enjoy it for minutes, days, or months, at the most, and then we are off wanting something else. It seems our senses are easily deceived, saturated or cloyed by good things. I remember as a child I waited with endless anticipation for the Chinese New Year which to my childish mind seemed to be the happiest day of the year and when the day actually dawned, it was an anticlimax – it was just an ordinary day in spite of the good time and goodies that we got as children. But the waiting and expectancy produced continuous sparks of excitement and happiness.

We seek for something or someone outside of ourselves in order to fill the many emotional chasms we experience, from childhood to the present. But things, money, people and events can never fill those gaps because they are never the cause of those emptiness within ourselves. Happiness is elusive, it comes and goes and vanishes like the mists on Penang Hill. 

Happiness can only come from within, from deep within our spirits. Our spirits have unfathomable longings that only God can satisfy. What makes us happy? We think we are happy when someone is kind to us or even when someone smiles at us. We think we are happy when someone listens to us and lends us their shoulder to cry on. We are also happiest when we do those same things for others. Many people think that they are happy if they have everything that money could buy. Sadly, this is not true. Many of the suicides were committed by the rich and famous who obviously felt that life had no meaning and that they had nothing to live for.

The secret to happiness is in giving, not receiving. Receiving is a side-effect, a bonus. True happiness comes not from seeking happiness but in giving happiness to others. When you give love to others, you are happy. When others give love to you, you are happy. When we love ourselves we are happy. When we love ourselves, we have love to give to others. I do have a critical spirit and it is not easy for me to love others and I do have a lot to learn to achieve true happiness.

The secret to unhappiness is seeking something outside yourself that will make you happy. The secret to happiness is to acknowledge and be grateful for what you already have. Happiness is not a matter of your actual circumstances. It is a matter of your attitude toward your circumstances.

One could be in prison and be happier than many who are supposedly free. One could have almost nothing, in terms of material possessions, and be happier than many millionaires. When we appreciate what we have and our life condition, we are happy. I remember a friend of mine telling me that her wealthy relative had lost her ability to enjoy such food as chicken because it is so common and ordinary. She needed to have exotic food to titillate her palate and excite her appetite. I believe that the poor man enjoys his meal of ikan bilis, fried kangkong and plain rice just as much or even more than the man as rich as Bill Gates enjoys his banquet.

This brings me to my conclusion that we should strive for the things that really matter – our good health, peace of mind, the ability to enjoy the simple things in life – the company of those we love, good healthy food, sunshine, fresh air and to enjoy the beauties of God’s creations – the starry heavens and the magnificent sunrise which brings hope of a beautiful day. These are long lasting pleasures that no amount of money can buy.

Are You Limited By Your Physical Frontiers?

From time immemorial, men have always long to have absolute freedom in every aspect of life. They long to fly like a bird, do what they like to do. But that is, of course, impossible. We are finite beings, we have inbuilt limitations. We are controlled not only by natural laws but we are also controlled by the laws of the country where we live. The Greek legend of Icarus who attempted to fly like a bird and died in the process is not only tragic but ludicrous and silly. We are entertained by the story of men’s attempt to do the impossible.



God has created us with certain limitations for obvious reasons; just imagine what kind of a world we would be living in if everyone could fly like a bird. What crimes could be committed by the sinful or evil inclinations of human nature if there were no laws in the country to control them. God in His infinite wisdom knows there need to be a boundary to our abilities. The more talents we have, the more wisdom we need to use them effectively. Adolf Hitler was not a man with ordinary abilities; he obviously was a compelling personality and had the gift to control the minds and hearts of millions of people but he did not have the wisdom (as we understand wisdom to be) to use his abilities for his ultimate benefit; in the process he destroyed the lives of millions of people, including himself. Likewise Saddam Hussein was such a man in our time. What are the secrets of their evil genius? People have often wondered.



Although in certain aspects, we need to have our freedom and abilities to be constrained, I thank God there is a world inside myself that has no boundaries, just like this universe has no frontiers. Within this little grey matter of mine, resides my mind or my soul. In the kingdom of the mind, I have all the freedom in the world, I can do whatever I like, I can weave dreams and fantasies and do things I would not dare to do in the real world. I can live in a world of fantasy and doing things I would not dream of doing in the real world. Well, I can do so with impunity but I cannot escape from the omniscience of God.. Temptation is not a sin nor a crime until it is executed in the real world.



Wonderful as this prospect of freedom of the mind is, it is nothing compare to the day when my spirit leave this house of clay; then there will be no limitations of space and time. I can be anywhere I want to be, In the spirit world, distance and time do not exist. I can travel millions of miles in the blink of an eye; I can spend a year basking in the sun as I live in eternity and there is no question of wasting time.



With the wonderful advancement in technology and the advent of the internet, life can never be the same for mankind. We can live a virtual world of our own invention. Much of our physical limitations have been removed. We can contact people on the other end of the world instantly; at the click of the mouse, we have access to knowledge and events round the world before us. A friend of mine has said, “the internet tend to make people more reclusive as they would spend time surfing it rather than to socialize”. I do not subscribe to this opinion. We have the freedom to connect with anybody in this world and it is harder for us to feel lonely in such an environment. I believe a recluse is one by nature, not one dictated by circumstances.



With so much limitations to connect with other people removed and unlimited access to knowledge and events, we also have unlimited potential to empower ourselves to work for a better life. Internet and network marketing have exploded; our businesses, whatever they may be, can be exploited to the furthest regions of the world and who knows what would happen in the years to come. If there is a colony of human beings on another planet, we can even have commerce with them.



Yes, we have very little reason to be lonely, especially if we can write and express ourselves well; I can share my thoughts, dreams and fantasies with the whole world. Now Google Adsense has made it possible to make money while sharing our thoughts, dreams and ideas in this expanding universe of infinite possibilities. Google Adsense is indeed a bonus or the icing to the cake to something that I truly enjoy and it is no chore at all. Thank you Google for making my job not only profitable but a pleasure in itself.